Always game for mischief and some down-right non-sense, the 'T-Gang' deserves a place here and rightly so. Right now the gang is reduced in size as they are without one of their founder members (and are sorely missing him). Btw, they are busy recruiting to fill the void. Anyone game ????!!!!!
An intro to the members of the gang and we will be right into some outrageous non-sense (I can hear you saying "Wasn't all the above non-sense too?") Anyway, here come the members of the gang.
'Terror' - That's how the most dis-organized n the laziest of 'em all is known !!!!
'Dreamer' - That's how their erstwhile member is known. Can be called 'Dream Theater' as well (Nah! I ain't referring to the gr8tst prog. metal band of all times!!!)
'Chatter-box' - That will be the last person in the gang. Non-stop rant - Anytime, anyplace !!!
Well, time now to dwell into all the non-sense.
1. Their asset - laziness
As already said, Terror is the laziest of 'em all. The Dreamer comes quite close. Imagine this - You reach their home and ring the bell. The Dreamer sends you an SMS. It reads: "The door is not latched. Come inside". Well, the door is just 7 steps away from the place the Dreamer sits !!!!! The disease did spread and Chatter-b has now become as lazy as the Dreamer. Blame it on proximity !!!
2. They excel at - wasting time
What else on earth are they supposed to excel at ?
3. They lay down - their own rules
Well, this one's from their book of rules: 'While time is at hand, do waste it. Life becomes a bore if all the time at your disposal is spent constructive'.
4. They love - food
Their rule book says: 'Love all, Hate none' . Well, am talking about food here.
5. They are addicted to - hotel Rhumaan's tea
They are so hooked to it that they never fail to sing its praise whenever someone visits them
6. They hate - waking up early
They are thanking their lucky stars that they need not wake up early on the day of their wedding. All their weddings (if they happen) will be conducted only in the evening !!!!!
7. They also hate - all working days & unclean people like Suresh .T !!
All 3 stand witness to the uncomprehendable leves of uncleanliness of Suresh.T
8. They will - sacrifice everything but sleep
That would be a very tough ask of them to do so.
9. Alarm clocks - have no effect on them
It is usually someone else who wake them up.
10. They wish - they get paid without having to work
And now that the whole world has come to know this, they sincerly believe such days are not far off.
11. They are - the perfect narcissists
With the exception of Terror, the Dreamer and Chatter-b love posing for pictures. Well, Dreamer has nearly 6000 pictures of himself.
12. They think - this blog is a well thought out effort
They definitely should - who else is gonna write about 'em ?
13. They believe - appam chutiya is the best thing to have happened to Indian Cricket !!
True to their nature, they have become ardent followers of some more crap called the 'FIP'.
14. They hope - they'll join swimming classes some day
They have been planning about it for 6 months now !!!!
15. They listen - to none !!!
Even if they would, who is ready to speak with them uh ?
16. They strive - to excel in non-sense
Very much evident from the fact that they will not open doors for visitors and instead SMS them the door is open.
17. Their chant - "Uh!! ahh !!"
The source of inspiration - would kick up a major controversy if disclosed.
18. Their sigh - 'Sabaaaa' !!
Founder and promoter: the Dreamer
19. They (are) - MAD !!! (Well, they 'Make a Difference!' - Ain't they ?)
Their contribution to the soceity - all the 18 pts mentioned above.
20. They will never forget - the Tirunelveli Halwa !!!!!!!!!!!
Courtesy: the one and only 'Terror' they failed to de-terrorise !!!!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Sunday, May 17, 2009
All crap and no sense from Peacock@Fox@Pea - Part 2
1. It is alleged that his liking (read: fetish) for Pink chaddis is very strong and quite unparalleled among people his age.2. These days he is sad as he finds it difficult to buy them off stores since chaddis his size are quiet not in stock. Pink chaddi owners therefore, beware when you dry 'em. The Peacock might be lurking somewhere around the corner with a foxy plan !!!
3. News is that, he has found solace that Scooby Doo undies his size are available now !!!!
4. His dressing table resembles that of a girl's, so have I been told. Hair removal cream (Anne French eh ?), Face wash gel etc., are his standard accessories.
5. It is common belief that he makes it a point to eat off more than what he pays for, especially if he happens to take part in a buffet b.fast/lunch/dinner.
6. Evident, as whenever in a buffet, he is the last to get off the table.
7. 'Ever the gentleman' - the image he tries to project.
8. But miserably fails - refer pt.4,18,19,20 in part 1.
9. Holds the cab driver squarely responsible for being late to work.
10.Late he is to work, Always!!!!!
11. His bluff (pt.9) therefore fails more often than it works !!!!
12. A min. of 30 minutes is what he needs to brush and get dressed. (It's common knowledge among the drivers that he'll wake up only after they have reached his home !!!!)
13. It is also alleged that he never feels inclined to take bath whenever he arrives to work in the morning shift !!!! That explains (pt.12) why the time he needs to get ready is just 30 min and not an hour !!!
14. According to him, there is nothing under the sun he doesn't know about !!!!
15. And ends up passing to others all the crap that he knows under the sun as a piece of 'Advice'
16. Whoever asks him for a opinion, would therefore be dead, in my opinion.
17. If there would be someone who would object to his 'Advice', he/she will be christened with an outrageous nickname and be made fun of till the day the world ends or the day he/she passes away - whichever happens first !!!
18. In his esteemed opinion (a worthy addition to the trash can) the hardest work on the planet - preparing the cab roster !!!!
19.Thinks and believes he is the 'Hardest, Smartest, Devoted' worker the world can ever see !!! - remember, he does the hardest work on the planet (pt.18) !!
20. No amount of persuasion/chiding will stop him from his nonsense !!!!!!!
Thursday, May 14, 2009
All crap & no sense from Peacock@Fox@Pea - Part 1
Peacock - the source of all nonsense that happens within my team !!!!1. Wherever he goes, be it to a restaurant or a movie hall or the office cafeteria, his primary job is to gawk at the crowd - especially at the fairer sex and try for opportunities to strike up a conversation with them. Reminds me of a few characters that the FIP has described in his blog.
2. When at a restaurant with his friends, he would rather choose to gawk at the crowd and forget the food. If you ask him "How's the food?" he would answer "The crowd's good".
3. Having said that, you should never expect him to converse with you especially if you both happen to be at a place filled with girls.
4. He would rather buy pasteries and give them to girls he does not know on the floor (provided he thinks they matchup to his expectations) than buy you a samosa.
5. He would then justify the act saying that they do not have anything to eat. Did they look malnourshied to him, I wonder ?
6. Even though he is pretty weak at all languages that he tries to speak, he still would make fun of the way others speak the same language.
7. If he is suppposed to ask his teammate how many emails he had worked on, he would say - "Rey, nee yenni emails raasinavu ?" - Means "Hey, how many emails did you write?". A very apt demonstration of his so called conversationary skills in his mother tongue.
8. He thinks North Indian girls make better life partners than South Indian girls for Southie men and therefore is hell bent on marrying a North Indian (No offense meant).
9. He would go on asking everyone he knows "What will you do if Mallika Sherawat proposes to you" and when they are about to answer, he will confront them asking "How on earth did you think that she will propose to you?".
10. He supposedly applies Pond's Talcum Powder generously and then goes to sleep. This is what he had to say about it to Mr. Akkulu Peekulu - "Rey, intiki yellipoyi manchika pond's powder yeskuni padukovaali ra!!!!'
- We all are planning to ask him where on earth he applies the powder & gift him a Pond's talcum powder carton on his B'day.
11. He thinks he looks young and stunning even though he has a receding hairline that is way beyond repair.
12. He is very concerned about the way his hair looks - even though he doesn't have much. Tell him that you know a special brand of oil that aids hair growth - he'll treat you like you are a King !!!
13. He will always have an answer for any question that you ask him.
14. The name he coined for smokers - 'Bathimaster' !!
15. If you invite him over for Lunch/Dinner at your home, he would first ask if you have hired thugs at your locality to the beat the s**t out of him.
16. He feels that he is the best entertainer around - now that we have FIP, could someone tell him that his place is now taken ?
17. The tribe that sends a shudder down our spine in men like us, the Eunuchs, have a special liking for him !!!!!! (Should we get confronted by the Eunuchs during a train journey, we believe Pea can very well save us if he happens to be travelling along with us).
18. He would blame you, the state you belong to, your race etc., if he thinks he is right and you are wrong. If you try to explain that you did not do what he thinks you did, he would then say "Who knows?"
19. He would always deny that he said something bad and unacceptable about your state/your race etc.,
20. And would also put across a senti statement "Why would I say that to you ? You are one among the best pals I have" thinking the person will fall for the senti crap.
Check out part 2 for further non-sense.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Among the crap, here is a good thing !!!!
At times some good things do happen. I tried to figure out a way to write something funny about it here and am still not able to find one. Let's come to the point here. I want to write something here and that's it !!!!! Read on !!!!!!
Yesterday, the 1st of May, there was this Housewarming ceremony I had to attend. It is called 'Grahapravesam' in Tamil and in English it's called 'Housewarming'. I doubt the correctness of the translation but I am absolutely clueless as to why the event has been named this way (why do not I write some crap about it ?). Could it be because everything under the sun is piping hot (40 plus is the temperature here !!!)
Let me cut to the point here. The new home belongs to our dear Peter Annan and it was real glad to see his family step into the new home. The new home is situated very close to the beach in the outskirts of Pondicherry (right on the ECR - more about the home later !!!)
For me, the day began at 6.30 am. Me and my friend Prabu were supposed to reach the new home before 7.30 am (which we never did manage and which is absolutely acceptable under the circumstances - am taking pains to explain this as none should get an hint that we are lazy !!!). We reached the place with a 'Gift' for annan & akka.
A very interesting custom in TamilNadu is to boil Milk as the first ever thing to be cooked / heated / boiled (whatever) in a new home. Not only in a new home but people who shift from a rented home to a new rented home too follow this custom (as to why this is still followed - let me come up with a new post). Friends and relatives would be invited to take part in this ceremony and after the milk boils over, will be distributed to all of them.
7.30 am was the time fixed for this to happen. The delay was because of a number of factors which were not under our control. Anyway, proceedings beagn. Pastor Noel prayed and blessed the home and the milk (after it came to a boil of course), was distributed to all. A few prayers were said and then it was breakfast time. The mason his helpers etc. etc all were given breakfast and we followed suit. At about 10 am we came back to town and got a few things ready which were needed for the evening (That evening was the actual function - All friends, relatives, friends of friends, neighbours etc were invited).
It was almost 12 noon and me and Prabu headed home. It was here that I committed a blunder. I had not had an haircut in the last 3.5 months as I had planned to grow it long(he he !!). Do not know what came over me yesterday, I decided to go for an haircut. I did. What followed was a disaster. I instructed the barber to use the cutting machine (I wanted it done fast and he did as instructed). The only thing I did not know (which the barber very well knew) was that clipper setting was at it highest (means it will take out a lotta hair and your scalp will be visible - tis' as good as getting your head shaven). The first swipe was above the left sideburn - what an hearbreak it was for me - the entire hair was gone and that part looked like a dressed broiler !!!! Cursing the machine, me and the guy, I asked him to use scissors, which he did. Alas, enough damage had been done already and after a few minutes, the left side was more uglier.
He then suggested that he would use the machine again to make my head look like it had been shaved off 2 weeks earlier - translates into - my head will appear shaven but it ain't - there would be a 2 week hair growth left. What could I probably do in such a situation ? This would go down as one the worst screwup barbaric barber job as I was supposed to get onstage and play music in the evening. The new bald look arrived after the barber huffed and puffed for a few mins and he was pleased with the way I was looking (all his jealousy (hair looking great) that would have flowed through his veins when he had seen me walk into the salon had evaporated by now). The worst part was, I had to pay him. Did that and walked out not with a heavy heart but wondering why this happened. Let me stop this barber ka story here lest you will never read about all the good thigs that continued to happen.
I came back home and heard the usual 'awww!'s and 'che's. I put up a show that I was cool with the new look and etc., and then headed for annan's place. We had lunch at his home (delicious chicken gray - tamilnadu style) and then Prabu headed out to get the PA and the DG guys ready. Meanwhile, I headed out on a different way to buy some stuff and then from there went to the new home straight.
Before I could reach there, all things were in place. The PA setup had been completed and Halogen lamps to light up the stage, the crowd and the home were at their right places - tied onto the coconut trees. There was this lovely looking Mapex Pro M drumkit on stage. Wow! it sure looks captivating and it was pleasure just to play for a few mins on that kit. Did I ever mention that it belongs to Prabu ? Well, it does and he is glad. There were this amazing Zildjain cymbals too. Prabu then finished up tuning the kit and it was ready. I, meanwhile setup the bass guitar and when all the issues with the power had been sorted out (the DG was behaving funny - we had electricity flowing in the Neutral, Power n Earth lines) it was showtime !!!!
The honour of inagurating a bathroom in the new home belonged to me and Prabu. We took a shower and were ready. It was 6 pm. The pastor from our church landed on time (that happens rarely) and so did a few. We began at 6 pm and after our pastor prayed it was time for some singing. It was good to see the crowd enjoy the music. We too, slowly got into the groove and from the 2nd song it was too good. We wanted to play more but after 4 songs it was time for the message. Pastor Noel shared the Word of God and then the new home was dedicated and blessed by Rev.Immanuel Bagawandoss.
It was 7 pm now and food arrived. Meanwhile, we were itching to get on stage to begin jamming up. The last time we had done so, was a few years ago (we all parted ways because our work places were different and then we never jammed together again till yesterday). We then decided that we will do so once the program ends. Naveen had brought his harmonica set and his new Mandolin (hope I got the spelling right) to add to the variety. It was about 15 mins past 7 and with the vote of thanks, the customary dinner began. It was at this time that we got on stage and we jammed n jammed for close to about 2 hrs (The 'Playin it till the fingers bled' thing doesn't happen for people who listen to DT and stuff). What a nice time it was to jam up with old friends. Lived and loved every moment of it.
After strutting our stuff, it was dinner time. We were looking forward to jammin' up after dinner too. Sadly, Pastor Noel had an appointment at Madurai the next day and had to leave. Naveen too had to leave as he had to see off Pastor. With a heavy heart, we started packing up and when we finished it was about 11 pm. We then prayed and then left for our places.
Looking back, I can very well say that I had one of the best days in my life. Hard to forget all the fun we had and the jam which we enjoyed to the core. At the same time I realise that these are moments which will not repeat, else their charm is lost.
Signing off with an undying hope that similar moments repeat themselves in the future !!!!
Yesterday, the 1st of May, there was this Housewarming ceremony I had to attend. It is called 'Grahapravesam' in Tamil and in English it's called 'Housewarming'. I doubt the correctness of the translation but I am absolutely clueless as to why the event has been named this way (why do not I write some crap about it ?). Could it be because everything under the sun is piping hot (40 plus is the temperature here !!!)
Let me cut to the point here. The new home belongs to our dear Peter Annan and it was real glad to see his family step into the new home. The new home is situated very close to the beach in the outskirts of Pondicherry (right on the ECR - more about the home later !!!)
For me, the day began at 6.30 am. Me and my friend Prabu were supposed to reach the new home before 7.30 am (which we never did manage and which is absolutely acceptable under the circumstances - am taking pains to explain this as none should get an hint that we are lazy !!!). We reached the place with a 'Gift' for annan & akka.
A very interesting custom in TamilNadu is to boil Milk as the first ever thing to be cooked / heated / boiled (whatever) in a new home. Not only in a new home but people who shift from a rented home to a new rented home too follow this custom (as to why this is still followed - let me come up with a new post). Friends and relatives would be invited to take part in this ceremony and after the milk boils over, will be distributed to all of them.
7.30 am was the time fixed for this to happen. The delay was because of a number of factors which were not under our control. Anyway, proceedings beagn. Pastor Noel prayed and blessed the home and the milk (after it came to a boil of course), was distributed to all. A few prayers were said and then it was breakfast time. The mason his helpers etc. etc all were given breakfast and we followed suit. At about 10 am we came back to town and got a few things ready which were needed for the evening (That evening was the actual function - All friends, relatives, friends of friends, neighbours etc were invited).
It was almost 12 noon and me and Prabu headed home. It was here that I committed a blunder. I had not had an haircut in the last 3.5 months as I had planned to grow it long(he he !!). Do not know what came over me yesterday, I decided to go for an haircut. I did. What followed was a disaster. I instructed the barber to use the cutting machine (I wanted it done fast and he did as instructed). The only thing I did not know (which the barber very well knew) was that clipper setting was at it highest (means it will take out a lotta hair and your scalp will be visible - tis' as good as getting your head shaven). The first swipe was above the left sideburn - what an hearbreak it was for me - the entire hair was gone and that part looked like a dressed broiler !!!! Cursing the machine, me and the guy, I asked him to use scissors, which he did. Alas, enough damage had been done already and after a few minutes, the left side was more uglier.
He then suggested that he would use the machine again to make my head look like it had been shaved off 2 weeks earlier - translates into - my head will appear shaven but it ain't - there would be a 2 week hair growth left. What could I probably do in such a situation ? This would go down as one the worst screwup barbaric barber job as I was supposed to get onstage and play music in the evening. The new bald look arrived after the barber huffed and puffed for a few mins and he was pleased with the way I was looking (all his jealousy (hair looking great) that would have flowed through his veins when he had seen me walk into the salon had evaporated by now). The worst part was, I had to pay him. Did that and walked out not with a heavy heart but wondering why this happened. Let me stop this barber ka story here lest you will never read about all the good thigs that continued to happen.
I came back home and heard the usual 'awww!'s and 'che's. I put up a show that I was cool with the new look and etc., and then headed for annan's place. We had lunch at his home (delicious chicken gray - tamilnadu style) and then Prabu headed out to get the PA and the DG guys ready. Meanwhile, I headed out on a different way to buy some stuff and then from there went to the new home straight.
Before I could reach there, all things were in place. The PA setup had been completed and Halogen lamps to light up the stage, the crowd and the home were at their right places - tied onto the coconut trees. There was this lovely looking Mapex Pro M drumkit on stage. Wow! it sure looks captivating and it was pleasure just to play for a few mins on that kit. Did I ever mention that it belongs to Prabu ? Well, it does and he is glad. There were this amazing Zildjain cymbals too. Prabu then finished up tuning the kit and it was ready. I, meanwhile setup the bass guitar and when all the issues with the power had been sorted out (the DG was behaving funny - we had electricity flowing in the Neutral, Power n Earth lines) it was showtime !!!!
The honour of inagurating a bathroom in the new home belonged to me and Prabu. We took a shower and were ready. It was 6 pm. The pastor from our church landed on time (that happens rarely) and so did a few. We began at 6 pm and after our pastor prayed it was time for some singing. It was good to see the crowd enjoy the music. We too, slowly got into the groove and from the 2nd song it was too good. We wanted to play more but after 4 songs it was time for the message. Pastor Noel shared the Word of God and then the new home was dedicated and blessed by Rev.Immanuel Bagawandoss.
It was 7 pm now and food arrived. Meanwhile, we were itching to get on stage to begin jamming up. The last time we had done so, was a few years ago (we all parted ways because our work places were different and then we never jammed together again till yesterday). We then decided that we will do so once the program ends. Naveen had brought his harmonica set and his new Mandolin (hope I got the spelling right) to add to the variety. It was about 15 mins past 7 and with the vote of thanks, the customary dinner began. It was at this time that we got on stage and we jammed n jammed for close to about 2 hrs (The 'Playin it till the fingers bled' thing doesn't happen for people who listen to DT and stuff). What a nice time it was to jam up with old friends. Lived and loved every moment of it.
After strutting our stuff, it was dinner time. We were looking forward to jammin' up after dinner too. Sadly, Pastor Noel had an appointment at Madurai the next day and had to leave. Naveen too had to leave as he had to see off Pastor. With a heavy heart, we started packing up and when we finished it was about 11 pm. We then prayed and then left for our places.
Looking back, I can very well say that I had one of the best days in my life. Hard to forget all the fun we had and the jam which we enjoyed to the core. At the same time I realise that these are moments which will not repeat, else their charm is lost.
Signing off with an undying hope that similar moments repeat themselves in the future !!!!
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